Vitalizing Marital Harmony: Rethinking the Dominance of Fiqh in Cultivating Sakinah Relationships in Indonesia

Dhuha Hadiyansyah; Wiwin Luqna  Hunaida; Zaharil  Anasy

doi:10.26555/ijish.v8i2.12848

Authors

Dhuha Hadiyansyah Universitas Al Azhar Indonesia, Indonesia
Wiwin Luqna Hunaida Universitas Islam Negeri Sunan Ampel Surabaya, Indonesia
Zaharil Anasy Universitas Islam Negeri Syarif Hidayatullah Jakarta, Indonesia

DOI:

https://doi.org/10.26555/ijish.v8i2.12848

Keywords:

sakinah marriage, Integrative-Mubadalah Fiqh, rights and obligations, age of marriage, ijbar

Abstract

This paper aims to explain why we need to rethink the fiqh approach in fostering a sakinah marriage. To date, in various discussions about the concept of a sakinah family, both in the community in the form of religious lectures and on various social media platforms, fiqh discourse has dominated. The fiqh discourse that is the focus of this paper is the rights versus obligations of husband and wife, the age of marriage, and the ijbar rights of parents towards their daughters. In response, this study proposes an “Integrative-Mubadalah Fiqh Framework”, a paradigm that bridges the normative dimension of classical fiqh with the relational ethics of mubadalah through the epistemology of knowledge integration. This framework redefines fiqh as a dialogical and ethical discourse that promotes equality, reciprocity, and marital harmony. As a solution, the approach of knowledge integration with the principle of mubadalah or mutuality is urgent to be disseminated as a mainstream discourse in the effort to foster a sakinah marriage. Integration of knowledge in the context of marriage means synthesizing various knowledge, perspectives, data, and experiences to form a more complete picture of the issue. Therefore, one approach , fiqh, for example , cannot be enough, because other fields such as psychology, psychiatry, sociology, philosophy, and law also address the themes of marriage. The principle of mutuality allows the married couple to have an equal voice in decision-making and to share marital and family responsibilities fairly based on their respective capacities. Mutuality in marriage also increases well-being in conjugal relationships, finances, childcare, sexual satisfaction, and relationships with in-laws. Meanwhile, mainstreaming these latest concepts is vital given that marriage is the core of the social system , the failure of marriage will undermine the larger social system.

References

Abdullah, M. A. (2006). Islamic studies di perguruan tinggi: Pendekatan integratif-interkonektif. Yogyakarta : Pustaka Pelajar.

Abubakar, A., Juliana, J., & Hasan, M. R. (2021). The Right of a Child Outside the Legal Marriage of a Biological Father: The Analysis of Ḥifẓ Al-Nafs as Law `Illat. Samarah: Jurnal Hukum Keluarga Dan Hukum Islam, 5(1), 153. https://doi.org/10.22373/sjhk.v5i1.9256

Allen, D. M. (2018). Coping with critical, demanding, and dysfunctional parents: Powerful strategies to help adult children maintain boundaries and stay sane. California : New Harbinger Publications.

Al-Mutairi, M. R. (2004). A study of the wife’s rights in Islamic Fiqh [Doctoral dissertation]. University of Birmingham.

Al-Sibai, M. (1989). Al-Fiqh al-Islami wa Adillatuhu, Cetakan ketiga. Bairut: Dar al-Fikr.

Amparado, M. J. B., Javier, P. M. C., Pomar, E. J. E., Aquino-Malabanan, M. G., & Landicho, L. C. (2014). Self-Actualization of Married and Unmarried among Middle aged Professionals. International Journal of Academic Research in Psychology, 1(1), 88–95.

Anshor, M. U. (2016). Girls’ Vulnerability in Child-Marriage. Jurnal Perempuan, 21(1), 59–65. https://doi.org/10.34309/jp.v21i1.4

Anwar, S. (2021). Hak Dan Kewajiban Suami Istri Menurut Undang-Undang Nomor 1 Tahun 1974. Al-Kamal: Jurnal Kajian Islam, 1(1), 88–98.

Asghari, S. (2019). Early Marriage in Iran: A Pragmatic Approach. Journal of Human Rights Practice, 11(3), 569–588. https://doi.org/10.1093/jhuman/huz035

Bear, A. L. (2014). From Charm to Harm: The Guide to Spotting, Naming, and Stopping Emotional Abuse in Intimate Relationships. Bloomington. IN: Balboa Press, a division of Hay House.

Bowles, S., & Gintis, H. (2011). A cooperative species: Human reciprocity and its evolution. In A Cooperative Species. Princeton University Press.

Bradshaw, J. (1996). Bradshaw On: The family: A new way of creating solid self-esteem. Health Communications, Inc.

Bradshaw, J. (2005). Healing the shame that binds you: Recovery classics edition. Health Communications, Inc.

Carpendale, J. I. M., & Lewis, C. (2015). The Development of Social Understanding. In R. M. Lerner (Ed.), Handbook of Child Psychology and Developmental Science (1st ed., pp. 1–44). Wiley. https://doi.org/10.1002/9781118963418.childpsy210

Chalik, L., & Dunham, Y. (2020). Beliefs About Moral Obligation Structure Children’s Social Category‐Based Expectations. Child Development, 91(1). https://doi.org/10.1111/cdev.13165

Clemens, V., Decker, O., Plener, P. L., Brähler, E., & Fegert, J. M. (2019). Authoritarianism becomes respectable in Germany: A risk factor for condoning physical violence toward children? Zeitschrift für Kinder- und Jugendpsychiatrie und Psychotherapie, 47(5), 453–465. https://doi.org/10.1024/1422-4917/a000684

Devine, L. (2016). Shekhinah as “shield” to Israel: Refiguring the Role of Divine Presence in Jewish Tradition and the Shoah. Feminist Theology, 25(1), 62–88. https://doi.org/10.1177/0966735016657711

Drigotas, S. M., Rusbult, C. E., & Verette, J. (1999). Level of commitment, mutuality of commitment, and couple well‐being. Personal Relationships, 6(3), 389–409. https://doi.org/10.1111/j.1475-6811.1999.tb00199.x

Edossa, W., Berhane, Y., Worku, A., Tesfa, A., Worku, A., Gulema, H., Fassil, N., Tewahido, D., & Tesfaye, S. (2021). Ideal age at first marriage is still below the legal age of marriage-the case of adolescent girls in West Hararge zone, Eastern Ethiopia. Ethiopian Journal of Reproductive Health, 13(2). https://doi.org/10.69614/ejrh.v13i2.430

Erikson, E. (1959). Theory of identity development. E. Erikson, Identity and the life cycle. Nueva York: International Universities Press.

Gill, A. K., & Hamed, T. (2016). Muslim Women and Forced Marriages in the UK. Journal of Muslim Minority Affairs, 36(4), 540–560. https://doi.org/10.1080/13602004.2016.1260324

Gillo, M. D. (2021). Fundamentals of Hermeneutics as A Qualitative Research Theoretical Framework. European Journal of Education and Pedagogy, 2(3), 42–45. https://doi.org/10.24018/ejedu.2021.2.3.43

Hadiyansyah, D. (2018). Falsafah keluarga. Elex Media Komputindo.

Hadiyansyah, D. (2019). Parent-Things: Yang Terlewat dari parenting. Elex Media Komputindo.

Hadiyansyah, D. (2021). Semua tentang Cinta. Elex Media Komputindo.

Hanafi, H. (2000). Islam In The Modern World: Religion, Ideology and Development, Vol. I. Kairo: Dar Kbaa.

Harari, Y. N. (2021). Sapiens A Graphic History, Volume 2: The Pillars of Civilization. Random House.

Hellinger, B., Weber, G., & Beaumont, H. (1998). Love’s hidden symmetry: What makes love work in relationships. Zeig Tucker & Theisen Publishers.

Henwood, G. (2020). Shoots of equal marriage and partnership in the Church of England: A harvest rooted and nurtured through practical theology. Practical Theology, 13(1–2), 96–108. https://doi.org/10.1080/1756073X.2020.1743929

Horii, H. (2020). A blind spot in international human rights framework: A space between tradition and modernity within the child marriage discourse. The International Journal of Human Rights, 24(8), 1057–1079. https://doi.org/10.1080/13642987.2019.1690468

John, N. A., Edmeades, J., & Murithi, L. (2019). Child marriage and psychological well-being in Niger and Ethiopia. BMC Public Health, 19(1), 1029. https://doi.org/10.1186/s12889-019-7314-z

Kidman, R. (2016). Child marriage and intimate partner violence: A comparative study of 34 countries. International Journal of Epidemiology, dyw225. https://doi.org/10.1093/ije/dyw225

Mahfudin, A., & Musyarrofah, S. (2019). Dampak Kawin Paksa Terhadap Keharmonisan Keluarga. Jurnal Hukum Keluarga Islam, 4(1), 75–93.

Marcus, A., Begum, P., Alsabahi, L., & Curtis, R. (2019). Between Choice and Obligation: An Exploratory Assessment of Forced Marriage Problems and Policies among Migrants in the United States. Social Policy and Society, 18(1), 19–36. https://doi.org/10.1017/S1474746417000422

Marshall, J., Wynn, K., & Bloom, P. (2020). Do Children and Adults Take Social Relationship Into Account When Evaluating People’s Actions? Child Development, 91(5). https://doi.org/10.1111/cdev.13390

Mayo, E. (2017). A short history of co-operation and mutuality. Co-operatives UK: Manchester, UK.

Michaud, N. (2018). Inappropriate Appeal to Authority. In R. Arp, S. Barbone, & M. Bruce (Eds.), Bad Arguments (1st ed., pp. 168–171). Wiley. https://doi.org/10.1002/9781119165811.ch32

Mudau, T. J., & Obadire, O. S. (2017). The Role of Patriarchy in Family Settings and its Implications to Girls and Women in South Africa. Journal of Human Ecology, 58(1–2), 67–72. https://doi.org/10.1080/09709274.2017.1305614

Munir, B., & Shafiq, T. A. (2019). Batas Usia Perkawinan dalam Undang-Undang Keluarga Islam Negeri Selangor Tahun 2003: Analisis Perspektif Maqasid Al-Syari’ah. SAMARAH: Jurnal Hukum Keluarga Dan Hukum Islam, 3(2), 271. https://doi.org/10.22373/sjhk.v3i2.4957

Niko, N. (2016). Poor Girls are Vulnerable to be Married: A Case Study of Dayak Mali Law in West Kalimantan. Jurnal Perempuan, 21(1), 41–47.

Nurani, S. M. (2021). Relasi Hak Dan Kewajiban Suami Istri Dalam Perspektif Hukum Islam (Studi Analitis Relevansi Hak Dan Kewajiban Suami Istri Berdasarkan Tafsir Ahkam Dan Hadits Ahkam). Al-Syakhsiyyah: Journal of Law & Family Studies, 3(1), 98–116. https://doi.org/10.21154/syakhsiyyah.v3i1.2719

Parkin, R. (2021). Arranged marriages: Whose choice and why? Reflections on the principles underlying spouse selection worldwide*. History and Anthropology, 32(2), 271–287. https://doi.org/10.1080/02757206.2021.1905255

Platt, M. (2017). Marriage, gender and Islam in Indonesia: Women negotiating informal marriage, divorce and desire (Vol. 51). Taylor & Francis.

Qadir, F. A. (2019). Qira’ah Mubadalah: Tafsir Progresif untuk Keadilan Gender dalam Islam. Yogyakarta: IRCiSoD 28.

Sa’dan, M. (2016). When Girls Give Birth Babies: Case Study of ChildMarriage in Sumenep Madura. Jurnal Perempuan, 21(1), 21–31. https://doi.org/10.34309/jp.v21i1.10

Saleh, J., Amri, N., Kamal, M., Abdullah, A., & Mukhtar, M. (2022). Marriage Guidance Towards Family Resilience in Aceh: A Study of Islamic Law Philosophy. Samarah: Jurnal Hukum Keluarga Dan Hukum Islam, 6(2), 594. https://doi.org/10.22373/sjhk.v6i2.12448

Satir, V., Banmen, J., Gerber, J., & Gomori, M. (1991). The Satir Model: Family Therapy and Beyond. Palo Alto, CA: Science and Behavior Books. https://www.goodreads.com/book/show/571672.The_Satir_Model

Shanti, H. D. (2022, December 20). BKKBN imbau masyarakat menikah di usia ideal cegah kematian ibu. Antara News. https://www.antaranews.com/berita/3315274/bkkbn-imbau-masyarakat-menikah-di-usia-ideal-cegah-kematian-ibu

Sigiro, A. N. (2020). Abolishing Child Marriage in Indonesia’s Marriage Law through Feminist Legal Theory and Child’s Rights Approach. Jurnal Perempuan, 25(2), 117. https://doi.org/10.34309/jp.v25i2.440

Singer, J. A., Labunko, B., Alea, N., & Baddeley, J. L. (2015). Mutuality and the Marital Engagement – Type of Union Scale [ME (To US)]: Empirical Support for a Clinical Instrument in Couples Therapy. In K. Skerrett & K. Fergus (Eds.), Couple Resilience (pp. 123–137). Springer Netherlands. https://doi.org/10.1007/978-94-017-9909-6_7

Srisusanti, S., & Zulkaida, A. (2013). Studi Deskriptif Mengenai Faktor-Faktor yang Mempengaruhi Kepuasan Perkawinan pada Istri. UG Journal, 7(6).

Sugiarti, T., & Tridewiyanti, K. (2021). Implikasi Dan Implementasi Pencegahan Perkawinan Anak. JLR - Jurnal Legal Reasoning, 4(1), 81–95. https://doi.org/10.35814/jlr.v4i1.2968

Tomasello, M. (2020). The moral psychology of obligation. Behavioral and Brain Sciences, 43, e56. https://doi.org/10.1017/S0140525X19001742

Ulum, M. B. (2014). Al Muawiyat Hadis-hadis Politis Keutamaan Sahabat [Disertasi]. Universitas Islam Negeri (UIN) Syarit Hidayatullah Jakarta.

Wolfinger, N. H. (2015). Want to avoid divorce? Wait to get married, but not too long. Institute for Family Studies.

Yarham, M. & Meiyanda. (2023). Tradisi Adat Jawa dalam Pelaksanaan Pernikahan Perspektif Hukum Islam. Al Maqashidi : Jurnal Hukum Islam Nusantara, 6(2), 58–73. https://doi.org/10.32665/almaqashidi.v6i2.2273

Zahro, H. A. (2023). Makna Hak Ijbar Dan Implikasinya Terhadap Hak Asasi Perempuan (Studi Kasus Di Desa Gondanglegi Kecamatan Prambon Kabupaten Nganjuk) [Doctoral dissertation]. IAIN Kediri.

Zuhaili, W. (1984). Al-Fiqhul Islamiy Wa Adillatuh (Vol. 4). Darul Fikr.